How to Beat Mom Guilt While Growing your Business

Mom guilt is a real thing. You may have experienced it without knowing the term. And if you haven’t, let’s prepare you to cope with mom guilt as you start your mompreneur journey.

What Is Mom Guilt?

It may feel different for everyone. The root cause is you feeling like your child is missing out on something that has to do with you, or that you’re missing out on something that has to do with them. Mom guilt is the thought that whatever you think you’re lacking will negatively damage your child, now or in the future.

For me, mom guilt felt like a sinking feeling in my stomach or chest with a little pinch of sadness. I started to think that maybe I should postpone my business goals (and personal life) until a later date.

As a mompreneur you may feel:

  • You should be spending time with your child instead of building a business
  • The baby should have your undivided attention 100% of the time
  • Your priorities don’t align with your values (the money comes first)
  • You’re choosing business over your family
  • You might miss an important milestone if you take time to focus on something you want or need 

While some of your thoughts and feelings may have some truth to them, everything should be in moderation. 

It’s impossible to never miss a moment, be there for all the things, and never take your eyes off of your baby without experiencing burnout. That burnout could leave you resentful and unable to provide in any form, physically, mentally, or financially. 

See also: 10 Productivity Tips for Moms To Handle Business 

How to Conquer Mom Guilt as a Business Owner

Mom Guilt Can Be Internal and External

Partners, spouses, or the kids themselves can unknowingly contribute to your feelings of guilt as a mompreneur. However, at the end of the day, it’s your own thoughts that convert to the feelings of mom guilt.

If your partner or spouse isn’t used to you having personal interests, hobbies, or goals, your new business journey may be shocking to them at first. 

Your new business commitment could cause them to feel neglected or they may not be used to sharing as much of the task load in your household.

Kids may also not want you to pay attention to work (even if you’re a work-from-home mom), go out to spend time with friends, or travel without them.

I recently had a co-parenting incident that sent me into feelings of mom guilt. My son spends the majority of his time with me, I cook for him often, we do activities together, he frequently has my undivided attention, and I take good care of him.

That wasn’t enough to stop my mind from spiraling into negative thoughts during that season of challenges with co-parenting. 

I started thinking to myself that “maybe I should be spending more time with him, maybe I should not take my self-care days or go on vacation, maybe I shouldn’t date until he’s older or out of the house.”

If I had acted on those thoughts and shut down my business and personal life, I would not be here helping you. Instead, I would be filled with a different type of guilt for giving up on my dreams.

Beating mom guilt means preventing possible resentment and overall unhappiness as a mom who can’t properly pour into your child or others.

Putting yourself in a position of not being motivated hurts yourself and everyone who depends on you.

How to Overcome Mom Guilt

It’s not uncommon to suffer from mom guilt, but you don’t have to stay that way. When I’ve had mom guilt in the past and recently, these are the steps I used and re-visited to overcome it.

Start with shifting your mindset. Everything starts in your mind. If you have negative feelings attached to your business or what will happen to your kids because of it, your actions will start to be negative too. You may start procrastinating or lack passion for the business or you might create false thoughts that others aren’t even having about you. Instead of feeling mom guilt, think of how your kids will benefit from your mompreneur journey such as:

  1. It can give them access to better schools
  2. You can be more flexible to attend events, field trips, pick them up from school, help out as a classroom or team mom, attend their games.
  3. Your business will bring additional income to the home, which could reduce stress.
  4. If travel is on your list, you can afford it and take the kids along to enjoy.
  5. Your kids get to see your plan, prioritize, pray, and take action to start and grow a business. That’s inspiration for them to be brave and try something new one day too!

See also: How Mindfulness for Mompreneurs Helps them Be Their Best Selves

Practice your consistency. Consistency is something I’ve challenged myself to work on this year. I’ve started with a consistent morning routine. Me not being a morning person, I’ve even started consistently waking up earlier than my son to have a quiet moment and complete simple tasks. That saves more time to focus on him later in the day. Your consistency will keep you motivated because you’ll see results. It will also communicate to your family how serious you are about the success of your business. Everything you reap from consistency will help cure mom guilt. You will realize your work is not in vain and that it helps your family.

Create a schedule and stick to it as much as possible. It may not be as easy as your child-free days, but scheduling your tasks will help you create balance and get rid of mom guilt.  Budget your time wisely by adding a few business tasks on schedule, personal and children’s appointments, self-care time, and time for your partner. If you know one day is meeting or appointment heavy, don’t overload tasks. Set a certain task count or hour count per day to work on the business (such as 2-4 tasks or 2-4 hours per day).

Make arrangements to give your baby your undivided attention each day. This doesn’t have to be a lengthy amount of time or an outing. The time or type is up to you as long as you focus on giving undivided attention. For me, these times are early in the morning when my son first wakes up, during his reading lessons, at lunch and dinner, or at night during bath time and before bed. During this time, we talk, I ask him questions, we hug and I give him kisses, I read his books or we draw, or we play a game. If you need help sticking to your schedule, set a timer.

Talk to your children and include them in your business activities. As early as the toddler years, you can start talking to your child and telling them what you are doing, how you’re doing it, and why. I’ve started telling my son when I’m about to have a meeting or go live. I also explain to him whether or not it’s okay to participate or if he should be good and quiet until I’m done. When I need 15 minutes, 30 minutes, or more time to work on a project, I tell my son and give him something fun to do (or eat) until I’m done. 

Create outings and activities just for you and your mini. Just like you need to schedule business tasks and meetings, date nights, personal time, and self-care, schedule in time with your baby. It doesn’t matter their age, the amount of time or what you do. Schedule that time for just you and the kiddos. It helps you catch up and stay updated on what’s going on with your children and vice versa. Plus, it gives you some time to do something fun without business distractions.

Do a self-check on why you want to be a mompreneur. What is your reason or your WHY. Many of our WHY’s are attached to our children, which is awesome motivation. I suggest you also have a reason outside of your kids. Ultimately, you want to make sure your reason for starting a business is not just attached to money. These questions may help:

  • Who do you want to help? 
  • Why do you want to help them in this way? 
  • What lights you up about your business and why does it get you out of bed in the same way your family does?
  • When did you realize you were passionate, talented, or gifted in this area?
  • Would you still love your business in the same way if you weren’t being compensated?

Cherish the moments you have with your baby. It’s not possible to catch every milestone at all times, even if you’re a full-time work-from-home mom who homeschools like me. Your child will still spend time with other family members, friends, etc. and you may not be present for those moments. What’s most important is that you cherish the time you have with them.  Be consciously present in the moment and document as much as you can. Take pictures, record videos, or write in a journal, to preserve the memories.

The Mompreneur Manual Group Is Here to Help

No matter the reason for your mom guilt, we’re here to help you overcome it and become the mom boss you were called to be. 

The Mompreneur Manual Facebook Group is here to guide moms through gaining a tribe of supporters, a team of helpers, business tools, and systems to be their best in business and life. We’re excited to give you a warm welcome! All you need to do is click to join.

Leave a Reply